Five lessons Labour needs to learn to deal with Farage and Reform

‘A fish stinks from the head.’

Those words were uttered by a colleague, so long ago now that I had a full head of hair, heatwaves occurred once every fifty years, not every fifty minutes and my beloved West Ham United had finished 18^th in the Premier League….at least some things don’t change!

President George W Bush, (it’s Walker by the way), backed by our very own Prime Minister Anthony Charles Lynton Blair, (Tony to his mates), had just embarked on a ‘shock and awe’ bombing campaign of Iraq in what proved to be a futile quest to find weapons of mass destruction, mainly on account, shock, awe and spoiler alert, that there weren’t any.

We were discussing the wrongdoing of others and whilst when it came to the fish, he may well have meant to say rot instead of stinks, and those words had little to do with WMD, (or who knows, maybe they did), just like the US artillery in Iraq, they hit their target, exploded with a deafening thud and sent the shrapnel carving them into my memory.  

And whilst that carving has become barely legible, eroding with each passing heatwave, it was whilst watching Nigel Farage tell the world he was so angry that he would resign as MP for Clacton, so that he could then stand to be MP for Clacton, that for some unbeknown reason, those fishy words surfaced from the depths bringing with them a hammer and chisel. 

I have long since felt Labour have spent too much time and energy on what to do about Nigel Farage and Reform and that the more Labour say that only they can beat them, the more Farage and Reform believe that they are unbeatable.  

And so, what to do? My advice; learn five lessons.

1. Stop feeding credibility

Don’t mention Farage and Reform (too much) because it gives them the credibility they crave and the publicity they pursue. There’s no such thing as bad publicity, there’s only publicity. Don’t give them any.

2. Don’t play cards when your opponent’s got one up their sleeve

Don’t shadow Reform’s policies, especially on immigration, because frankly, it seems to me that’s the only card they’ve got to play. The more Labour nudges closer to Farage and Reform’s positions, the easier it becomes for them to deceive through sleight of hand.

3. Don’t worry about polls or lettuce

Farage and Reform have been leading in the polls for longer than the lettuce that outlasted Liz Truss as Prime Minister. Polls are a snapshot in time, they don’t last for all of time. Even that lettuce eventually went rotten. 

4. Be proud. Be loud. Be louder.

Labour have achieved some incredible things in the two years it’s been in power which is all the more remarkable given Morgan McSweeney’s admission that Labour wasn’t prepared enough to govern.

Reduced NHS waiting lists: lifting the two child benefit cap: strengthening employment rights: free breakfast clubs: higher wage growth: protecting renters rights: increasing the minimum wage and I could go on.

Labour should be unashamedly proud.  Get a megaphone, find a rooftop, start shouting.

5. Labour should just be Labour

Should Labour tack right in the hope former ‘red wall’ voters will climb back over and into the forgiving arms of the family they once fled?  

Should Labour should tack left to place clear blue (red?) water between itself and Reform so that Reforms’ policies look obscure and outlandish?

Or should Labour stay in the centre, do as little that’s controversial as possible, and just keep on delivering?  

Agreeing to disagree amiably is the greatest of Labour’s political strengths because it reminds those who disagree on what it is they agree, namely, to leave a more progressive, more equal and fairer society.

And so, Labour should just be Labour.  It’s not about tacking this way or that, it’s about being anchored to Labour values.

And finally…

There can often come a time when your greatest political asset becomes your greatest political liability.  When overhearing someone not long ago refer to Nigel Farage, rather unkindly I thought, as ‘toad face,’ could it be that time has begun?

Farage is often portrayed as being a man of the people and as anti-establishment.

Well, if being a man of the people and anti-establishment involves being privately educated, working as a commodities trader in the City of London, owning multiple homes, earning (in addition to being paid as an MP) in excess of £1M in other work and receiving a £5M gift from a crypto billionaire, (which then ends up being investigated by the parliamentary standards commissioner as to why it wasn’t declared), then I suppose he is. 

There will now be a by-election in Clacton and the main political parties have decided not to join the circus.  

Rachel Reeves has said the people of Clacton deserve better, she’s right but she’s also said that she wouldn’t stop Farage ‘arguing with a bin.’  

On 13^th August 2026, Clacton will face up to a by-election face-off: Toad Face vs. Binface.

The question though, once the circus rolls out of town, is will Nigel Farage have saved face?