And don’t come back

After describing Britain as "mosque-drenched", progressives don't need persuading. Jeremy Clarkson should follow his own advice and leave Britain.

Progressives don’t need persuading. Jeremy Clarkson should follow his own advice and leave the country.

After describing Britain as “mosque-drenched” and denouncing Albanians for taking university places and stealing wheelbarrows in his Sunday Times column yesterday, Jeremy Clarkson went on an extraordinary diatribe about his emigration options:

“You can’t go to France because you need to complete 17 forms in triplicate every time you want to build a greenhouse, and you can’t go to Switzerland because you will be reported to your neighbours by the police and subsequently shot in the head if you don’t sweep your lawn properly, and you can’t go to Italy because you’ll soon tire of waking up in the morning to find a horse’s head in your bed because you forgot to give a man called Don a bundle of used notes for “organising” a plumber.

“You can’t go to Australia because it’s full of things that will eat you, you can’t go to New Zealand because they don’t accept anyone who is more than 40 and you can’t go to Monte Carlo because they don’t accept anyone who has less than 40 mill. And you can’t go to Spain because you’re not called Del and you weren’t involved in the Walthamstow blag. And you can’t go to Germany … because you just can’t.

Do we have to go on? Oh alright then:

“The Caribbean sounds tempting, but there is no work, which means that one day, whether you like it or not, you’ll end up like all the other expats, with a nose like a burst beetroot, wondering if it’s okay to have a small sharpener at 10 in the morning. And, as I keep explaining to my daughter, we can’t go to America because if you catch a cold over there, the health system is designed in such a way that you end up without a house. Or dead.

“Canada’s full of people pretending to be French, South Africa’s too risky, Russia’s worse and everywhere else is too full of snow, too full of flies or too full of people who want to cut your head off on the internet.”

Frankly, Jeremy, we don’t care where you end up so long as you leave and do so quickly.

26 Responses to “And don’t come back”

  1. Shamik Das

    “Anon E Mouse”, the only person whose opinions are backward and out dated is Clarkson. Someone should tell him this is 2009, not 1959!

  2. Liz McShane

    Anon E Mouse – Clarkson’s views are snide and offensive. He loves mocking political correctness when all it is, is having mutual respect for ‘others’ – nothing more, nothing less. It is outdated for someone to behave like he does.

  3. Anon E Mouse

    Shamik and Liz – he has a right to those opinions – you may disagree with them – that’s ok – but he has that right. Just like Question Time were right to have Nick Griffin on – he’s got over a million votes – far more than Gordon Brown ever got.

    All people saw (not me but comments I hear in the pubs locally)was an elected MEP being picked on by a sanctimonious bunch of bullies. The fascist behavior of those crowds outside was a disgrace.

    If he wants to hold those views as long as he doesn’t incite any trouble then why shouldn’t he? I have homosexual friends but don’t want to see men kissing either – I must have the right to feel like that.

    I heard that awful Yvette Cooper on Radio 4 this morning lying about the Tories (supposedly) cancelling Tax Credits and these lies are allowed to go unchallenged for some reason. It’s why Labour and their cronies are due to be ousted BIG time at the election and rightly so.

    Nick Griffin flourishes because Labour try to shut down conversation they don’t like – the party has become too dogmatic and controlling.

    Regarding political correctness I just don’t see it like you Liz – you really are in a minority and it’s dangerous. It may be misconstrued but when a 97 year old man can’t have a cake cooked by his niece in his home in Devon… well you get the point. Playgrounds have no witches hats any more and the roundabouts are all slowed down with soft tarmac in case the kids scrape their knees – goggles to play conkers where has the “fun” of childhood gone?

    It’s why “Caroline Not Happy” above states: “Who asked the folk living there if they wanted Mosques in their communities and all that follows – burkhas, woman treated unequally, homosexuals threatened with death, female genital mutilation, “honor” killings, forced marriage …etc etc”

    Tell me Liz, in your Utopian, disconnected from reality world, why I should have respect for anyone that holds those views?

    Once these things start there does not seem to be any end and once combined with the control freak tendencies of New Labour there seems to be no way out.

    Someone needs to say STOP THAT’S ENOUGH – IT’S GONE TOO FAR but they won’t.

    So we get terrorists from Afganistan who hijack a plane, fly it to Gatwick and instead of being immediately deported our taxes are used to give them hundreds of thousands of pounds in compensation and we are told we can’t deport them? There are hundreds of other cases like this Liz but get some perspective here.

    Jeremy Clarkson has raised millions for “Help For Heroes” – money needed due to the underfunding by this government. You may not like him – I don’t like Marmite – but I find this governments views are snide and offensive – Damian McBride etc are beyond words and judging by the opinion polls I’m not alone.

  4. Shamik Das

    Anon E Mouse, if you’re referring to the European election results, the BNP got 943,598 votes, Labour got 2,381,760 votes. Nick Griffin did not get more votes than Gordon Brown. He did not get more than a million votes. You seem more than happy to accuse others of making false statements; maybe you’d like to take this opportunity to correct your assertion that Griffin “got over a million votes” and got “far more [votes] than Gordon Brown ever got”.

  5. Anon E Mouse

    Shamik, 943,598 votes? – near enough a million.

    Brown secretly planned Public Service cuts of 9.3% and ran down Cameron for proposing 0.7% more at 10%.

    You don’t see anything wrong with that Shamik? Really?

    For Labour to only get two and a half times the number of votes as the BNP is beyond belief – the Labour Party are horrified by that fact – why aren’t you?

    Regarding Browns votes, I meant for the leadership of their respective parties. Brown’s thugs and bullies, McBride and Co, leant on ordinary members to not ask for a leadership election.

    People like me also voted for Tony (Full Third Term) Blair. The way Brown and his cronies treated him was also a disgrace.

    Finally who did I accuse of making false statements? Yvette Cooper openly lied this morning on the Today program – even when challenged, albeit pretty lamely, by the presenter she continued to lie.

    What sort of an example is that to send to the public? Am I to assume you think that smearing and lying about people is an acceptable way to behave in life? Really Shamik?

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