The Express lives up to its reputation as a non-news 'newspaper'
The Daily Express is fond of running miracle cures on its front page. A new pill to cure Alzheimers, a breakthrough on Dementia, Cancer a thing of the past etc.
No doubt these stories are of interest to the paper’s ageing readership.
But today the paper has a genuine scoop:
5 EASY STEPS TO LIVE LONGER
Cut your risk of heart failure by half
Okay, you have our attention. Go on.
“Just five simple rules hold the key to a long life, scientists say.”
Wow, scientists! Tell me more.
“A healthy lifestyle can slash the risk of heart failure by half in those aged over 65.
The golden rules include regular exercise, sensible eating, maintaining a healthy weight, moderate alcohol consumption and not smoking.
“Two decades of research lie behind the dramatic discovery.”
Amazing! A healthy lifestyle is good for your health! Blow me down with a feather. Let’s look at those ‘golden rules’ again:
1. regular exercise
2. eat well
3. don’t be over or under weight
4. don’t drink too much
5. don’t smoke
Who knew!
I’m sure the Express team didn’t hesitate in deciding whether to put this ‘dramatic discovery’ on the front page of its, er, newspaper.
Still, it does seem to contradict the paper’s recent splash claiming chocolate can add years to your life. How confusing!
Adam Barnett is a staff writer at Left Foot Forward. Follow MediaWatch on Twitter
Read more:
Surprise! Daily Express gives five star review to proprietor’s memoirs
Life-saving chocolate and self-love: the Daily Express is not a newspaper
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11 Responses to “Daily Express reveals the secret of living longer: a healthy lifestyle”
Selohesra
It may seem obvious yet millions do not pay any attention to some/all of these tips – perhaps seeing it in black and white may just shock a few of them into making some lifestyle changes
Cole
It’s certainly cheaper for Mr Desmond than hiring proper journalists.
Selohesra
You’re just bitter that all the lefties reading the Mirror wont learn these tips whereas the UKIP/Tory voters reading the Express will live long and continue to vote against Labour 😉
Ulysses Jefferson
I’m going outside for a fag!
Torybushhug
‘The Express lives up to its reputation as a non-news ‘newspaper”
Adam lives up to his reputation as member of the pious, imperious set gazing down from Hampstead Hill, handing down messages of virtuous wisdom.
Perhaps they should throw fair trade guava halves at moronic Express readers.
No wonder so many blue collar people have turned to UKIP.